Every year, primarily in the summer, we clean up the brush and fallen branches found throughout our property. There are some years where we have to take down some trees. And there are some years that trees have been thrown to the ground by a storm.
It’s never ideal to clear a fallen tree, because that almost always occurs at the most inconvenient time. Like when you’re already running late for something and find you’ve got a flat tire.
And, it’s never enjoyable to purposefully cut down a tree or clear brush - both literally and figuratively. But, there are times when a tree is leaning a little too much and at risk of collapsing with the next big gust of wind.
It reminds me of relationships, habits and behaviors.
Sometimes my habits change because of a new routine or life change. And some of my relationships ebb and flow and fade away. Or, my behaviors adapt once I’ve processed some new information.
And sometimes, I am fully aware that I have outgrown a habit that was born as a coping mechanism, but it’s really hard to break because it’s become part of my daily life. Or, I start to feel “ew” about some of my own behaviors (like my struggle with being patient). Most difficult of all, when I know a relationship requires some boundaries or a change to stay healthy.
There are days when life naturally removes the things that no longer serve. And there are many other days, when it’s time to make a conscious decision to remove or modify those things.
If it’s no longer serving you….
If it’s no longer bringing you joy…
If it’s no longer bringing you sustenance…
let it burn.
When the cold winter days arrive, we bundle up, grab a lawn chair and a drink, and we burn it all down until it turns to pure ash. Sometimes this requires multiple burns, and other years the first fire will burn on for days.
We invite friends to join us and we hear about their lives, the adventures the previous year took them on and the lessons they’re taking with them into the next year.
And I’m inviting you!
Find the brush that needs to be removed.
Find the trees that are about to topple over on the roof.
Find the fallen logs blocking the path in your life.
Toss ‘em all in this big ‘ole pile with us and we’ll watch it burn and…
Let go of others’ expectations of us
Let go of the “shoulda’s” we apply to ourselves
Let go of the fear that keeps us bound to unhealthy relationships
Let go of the self-induced shame from mistakes made in the past
Let go of the habit that you’re aching to eliminate (pressing snooze 5x each morning)
And just like the fire we light, it may take multiple rounds of burning that brush down to get ash. Just as it may take multiple retries to remove a habit, change a behavior or identify the right boundaries.
When I have to re-ignite the flames over and over again, I’m going to do it with self-compassion. And I encourage you to do that too. It’s not about changing or adapting the first try - it’s about growth.
And ash contains so many elements that are beneficial for strong and healthy growth.
Once the fire subsides and the embers and coal are cooled, grab a handful of that ash and sprinkle that shit on your breakfast & revel in your growth.
For the last ~7 months, I’ve posted a photo and message on LinkedIn that I referred to as a Weekly Serotonin Boost. There was a lot of heaviness in the world (let’s be honest, there still is), and doom scrolling became a habit.
I wanted to give a reprieve between the doom posts and have something light and fun or encouraging to bring a little joy to others’ day. I’m continuing that series on Forest Whispers vs. a LinkedIn post, so feel free to share with friends, family or even fr-enemies you think could use a little boost today.
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Loved this piece and it RESONATED!!